Accepting the Unusual

Greetings friends and drifters!

I have returned from 10 days with family in the sunny (and expensive) world of Disney and the Florida beach. It was exhausting, invigorating, and, as always, eye opening.

Because of bad posture in the past (so my husband says) I have a hard time standing up straight. I’ve been working on that for some time now, but walking around the park for 12 hours did a number on my shoulder and back. So the second day I rented a handicap scooter.

You would have thought I spilled cherry Kool-Aid on my white shirt.

Instead of reveling in the relief of the strain on my shoulder, I became totally self conscious and embarrassed. I felt all eyes on me, as everyone else was walking while I was riding.

Even more weird is that I wasn’t the only one riding a scooter. 

I would have done anything for my fellow rider — I thought nothing of renting her a ride. But it was something else when I was the rider.

Why couldn’t I walk like everyone else? I’m not that old. I’m not that out of shape. Everyone else could cross back and forth across the parks — why couldn’t I?

I think it was more of my having to accept my own reality that blew me away. I really was older than most around me. I really did have a hard time keeping up with kids and grandkids. I should have been able to ride roller coasters and stand in line for a half hour and wander from ride to ride without help. But I couldn’t.

I don’t know exactly what image I held in my mind of where I was in my life, but it certainly didn’t match my reality in Florida. 

And that upset me.

We all say we know who we are and what we feel and what made us what we are. But do we always?

I didn’t think I’d have such an adverse reaction to something as simple as riding a scooter through an amusement park. I never thought I’d choose being embarrassed and uncomfortable over taking care of myself.

Happily, I snapped out of my self pity fog by the second day. I did need help getting around and I was fortunate enough to be able to rent mobility to make my days easier. 

I was lucky to be at the park, period. Others were not as lucky.

But looking yourself in the eye can be … well, eye-opening. And better to accept it earlier than later. Once you do you still have a world of options before you.

Be who you are. Be proud of who you are. And don’t let it hold you back from moving forward in your life.

The parks were just marvelous …