Croning My Way Through Life
I like nonsense, it wakes up the brain cells. Fantasy is a necessary ingredient in living, it’s a way of looking at life through the wrong end of a telescope. Which is what I do, and that enables you to laugh at life’s realities.
~ Dr. Seuss
Today, as most days, I find myself lost in the world of letters. Of acronyms. They haunt my day, stand in for lengthy explanations and too many words.
Sometimes I write these acronyms on a sticky note and place it at the base of my computer screen where no one can see it but me. A subtle reminder to stop doing whatever it is that I’m doing.
Like M.Y.O.B.
How many times do you find yourself getting worked up about something that has nothing to do with you? Your opinion really doesn’t matter because you really don’t know much about it. Yet you yap it up like it’s all about you.
S.S.D.D.
Everybody always asks how’s work or your family or your social life. For most of us, life doesn’t change much day to day. Somebody will ask what my plans are for the evening, and they’re the same every night. Eat, clean, watch TV, go to bed. Unless I get asked to the Met Gala or to go out to eat at Sobelmans, it’s pretty much S.S.D.D.
E.T.C.
Everyone knows this oldie acronym. It’s like yadda yadda but with initials.
B.F.D.
Everything in my life is a B.F.D. Just ask me. I need to learn to tone things down. Everything’s not a crisis. Everything’s not about me. See M.Y.O.B. for reference.
R.O.F.L.
There are a few Internet shortcuts that could apply to me, but if I have to think of what they mean every time I use them (like R.O.F.L. and A.F.K. and A/S/L) they are really just letters to me. What’s worse is that my friend David (http://davidkanigan.com/) had to tell me I had my letters mixed up!
B.2.B.
A popular phrase around work, I used to think it was body to body. Then I realized our company is a B2B. I didn’t think my translation was appropriate. Business to Business, they say.
B.F.F.
Mine drifted away last year, so the meaning has changed. But I still know what it means in a cosmic sort of way.
L.M.A.O.
A rare condition these days, nothing is better than laughing yourself silly. And my ‘A’ could use a little trimming anyway.
L.O.L.
This is a popular one, especially from my texting friends. It can mean Lots of Love or Lots of Luck, but whenever I see it I just think of lollygagging. Or lolly. Nonsense no matter which initials you use.
O.M.G.
Another popular one, often used around little kids so they don’t hear you using the Lord’s name in vain. I don’t know if there are acronyms for other swear words, though, but I really should put that on my research list.
P.O.T.U.S.
I didn’t know what that meant until a few years ago. Imagine. 60 years old and figuring it meant the place where you went to the bathroom. Where I got that I’ll never know. Never.
There are many, many more shortcuts for words in this world. As I said before, the Internet is full of them. But I have enough pressure on my brain cells in learning new programs at work that I don’t need to remember letters and abbreviations to get through the day.
My life is short enough the way it is. I don’t need acronyms to make it even shorter.
G.B.C.U.L8R.
Now that the pain in my back is almost gone, my mind is free to wander — and that’s always a scary thing. Here are some cosmic thoughts (past and present) to get you going this fine Tuesday evening —
Have a great rest of your week!
You would think the winter chill would freeze my wandering brain cells, or at least slow them down some. But as pretzel thinkers know, nothing can slow down a wandering, criss-crossy mind.
I thought about this blog this morning on the way to work. I was listening to the results of the New Hampshire primary, and wondered how our political future was going to turn out.
One thing led to another, and in my own wandering mind, I thought of putting out there some metaphysical, ethereal, weird thoughts that have no answers. Take away all political bias, all psychological jumble, and just wonder….
THAT would be the answer to all answers…
Why not fill your head with useless — but amusing — information? Here’s a few facts that you can toss around with friends and family.
In the Lord of the Rings, although Bill the Pony is a feature of the novel, the writers initially decided not to include him as the Fellowship make their journey for the simple logistical reason of transporting a horse deep into the mountains. The problem was solved in the more difficult shots by using the classic pantomime trick of dressing two people up as a horse, one at the front and one at the back.
The average American’s vocabulary is around 10,000 words — 15,000 if you are really smart. Shakespeare had a vocabulary of over 29,000 words.
47 elephants and dancing bears survived the sinking of the Titanic and got jobs in New York thereafter.
In the movie Carrie, the slow motion scene at the end of the movie was filmed in reverse to simulate ghostlike movement effects. If watched vigilantly, cars can be seen driving backwards in the upper left hand corner of the screen.
For the movie The Wizard of Oz, Judy Garland got paid $35 a week, while Toto got paid $125.
The national anthem of Greece has 158 verses. No one in Greece has memorized all 158 verses.
Almonds are a member of the peach family.
Humoring the Goddess 