Evidence!

CAM01055I know this is supposed to be a Goddessy blog, with Goddessy, middle-aged stories. And it is.

Maybe this is just a middle-aged reaction to thieves in the night. Thieves in the cold, crisp dawn. Thieves in the whisper of the early morn.

Last night I went to watch my grandbaby and his swimming lessons. Came home, set my purse on the sofa end table, loved and pet the dogs and cats, and went to bed. Somewhere in the late night I let them come and sleep with me for a couple of hours. (Mistake number 1).  Now, I’m not a sleep-with-the-animals kinda girl, but when I’m overtired and I don’t want to hear the dogs click-click-click across the wood floor, I invite them now and then to sleep on the bed.

Hubby comes home at 4, feeds said cats and dogs, and kicks all animals out of the room, and things are quiet until I get up for work a couple hours later. (Mistake number 2).

I get up this morning to go to work, and look at what I found on the dog’s pillow! My glasses soft case, a bracelet, and my flash drive holder! My first instinct was to blame the dogs…they are big, naughty, lovey chocolate labs. They get into the garbage, run away helter skelter if not watched, and bug me 95% of my waking hours. So who easier to blame for the woes of my domestic tranquility than them?

Later in the day I tell hubby about finding my prized possessions on the dog pillows, and, low and behold, he said it was my cats. My little Tom and my fatty Mysty. I say, “wha?” He says, oh yeah, I hear them playing hockey with things I leave out all the time. Pens, pins, bracelets, all kinds of trinkets find their way off the tables and onto the floor courtesy of my kitties.

Humph!

Now, it’s only the two of us (humans) in the house; it’s babyproofed when my grandbaby comes to visit, but otherwise it’s a kind of pick-up-when-you-feel-like-it place. I lived a long time to be able to live this way.

Now I find I have to kitty-proof my house. Including zipping my purse closed, it seems.

What ever happened to the carefree days of middle age? Those days when your kids are gone and you are free to walk around in your underwear and drink milk straight from the jug? The days when you are free to leave your purse open without fear of some ransacking animal pulling things out of it and seeing if they bounce? Before you know it they’ll be pulling out my toothbrush and brushing their kitty teeth or using a fork to eat their cat food, ordering cat trinkets on HSN and ordering tuna pizza from Pizza Hut.

Now that I think about it, though, it’s actually kinda funny to picture fat cat digging around in my purse, pushing the lipstick and gum aside, just to find the empty cloth glass case, picking it up with her teeth, pulling it out, shaking it around, and fetching it across the room, leaving it on the dog’s pillows, setting them up for the fall.

I guess she’s not such a dumb cat after all.

 

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5 thoughts on “Evidence!

  1. Oh, Claudia! This made me laugh! I have to keep my purse zipped or our beagle will get into it looking for tissues to eat. One day last summer, I caught him on the sofa with dollar bills around him and a $10 bill in his mouth. I managed to get the bill out of his mouth; it was only missing the corner. When I went to put the money back into my checkbook in my purse, I saw I was missing a $20 bill. I looked everywhere, but it was gone. The dog looked guilty.

    My husband, bless his heart, watched for that $20 bill. It came out a week later! It was intact with only a pinhole effect over it. He washed it with the hose, bleached it, dried it, and put it back into circulation!! Our son and I were so grossed out. Husband swears that bill was cleaner than most bills you touch on a daily basis.

    You have it much worse. Cats are sneaky!!

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  2. I can totally sympathize. What possessed me to keep adopting cats one after another, I don’t know. Chalk it up to lunacy, I guess. At one point there were 5 of them. Two have passed and one has gone home with his mommy…my daughter. I still have two who are 12-year-old siblings. Because of the multitudinous number of felines, I have had to cat proof my house. Between canned sprays that deter them from going where they shouldn’t, I’ve also invested in these black pads that can be lain over whatever it is I don’t want the kitties sitting or strolling along. An awful noise goes off if they step on the pad. The two cats that remain have totally gotten use to both sprays and pads since they’ve occupied the lower level of our house for a number of years and have managed not to shred the furniture…as they had done in the past.

    Can’t live with them; can’t live without them. But…they’re so lovable, nonetheless.

    hugs…

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  3. Cats are smarter than a 5th grader. They know how to get humanoid attention. Our cat moved my glasses one night because her food dish was empty. It took me about 4 hours to find my glasses. Keep in mind we live in a 38 foot motorhome so hiding places are not out in the open. Now go love on the dogs you accused of this mischief.

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