Wussying Out On My Crone Night

I think I am failing Crone 101.

For those of you who wonder, a crone is an older woman, wise in the ways of the world, confident in where she’s been and where she’s going. She is the accumulation of life’s ups and downs, and all that knowledge seems like magic to some.

I used to be more in a magic way. I didn’t cast spells or levitate glasses or dance naked before the bonfire (wouldn’t THAT have been a scene!). I was, am, a believer in the magic that is in each and every one of us. You can have magic and be Catholic or Lutheran or Baptist or Atheist. The magic inside is your soul. Your connection to this world, to the galaxy, and everything inbetween.

My husband works  3-4 nights a week. So I’m home alone, which, for me, is great, because I’m either writing or editing or doing nothing but watching a Chinese TV series. Well, last night was a big, bright, beautiful full moon. I didn’t really see it until it was over the treetops in my back woods. So I looked online and thought, “Hey! Even though the moon tonight will be 98.2 percent full, I can go out to the back gate and watch it rise!”

Now I’ve told you before that I have to cross a big wide “yard” and go down this little path through the dark woods until I get to the back gate that sits on a little road that lines a great big cornfield. Perfect moonwatching place.

I went out early. It was dusk outside, a nice cool spring breeze. So I stood at the back gate and realized I was 25 minutes early. Great. Then I start hearing things in the woods as it started to really get dark. Sticks falling down from the top of the trees, leaves blowing down the dirt path…all kinds of little things.

If you are a writer then you know where I’m going with this. It doesn’t take much to set my imagination off. And as it got dark and I’m waiting for moonrise I’m thinking of Slenderman who hides in the forest walking down the path towards me and I can’t get the gate open and he walks up to me and starts talking and waving those abnormally long arms around and I’m alone and even my dog is on the front deck so she’s no help but I have my phone but by the time I’d call my hubby or the police he could already have pulled out a knife and started slashing my legs so I couldn’t run and….

You see what I’m getting at. I worked myself up so much I decided to head back to the house and enjoy the moonrise through my locked back window. Now the chance of someone walking into my fenced woods is slim to none. But as I’ve said before in my blogs, I’m a little lady with no punch and too much imagination.

So back to my first thought. I wanted to welcome the full moon, wrap my Croneness around it, pull strength and wisdom from its moon rays, yada yada. It’s all a game but it makes me feel good.

Now I’m sitting inside, my magic rumbling that it didn’t get its true moon fix, and all I want to do is finish watching my Chinese war TV series.

What’s magical about that?

I think I’ll write a story about this. Maybe if I get this paranoia out of my system I can go watch the full moon rise next month. With my dog. And my husband. And my son. And a police officer. And a Navy SEAL….