Tag: personal time

An Evening Alone (repost)

~ humoringthegoddess ~ 10 Comments

On my way to something else ……

A fun — and still true — blog from October 2020.  It’s for all of you — you know who you are — and I’m still there ……

 

An Evening Alone

 ~ humoringthegoddess

Do you ever wish you had an evening or two to yourself? All by yourself?

That seems to often be a fleeting thought to new moms, seasoned moms, wives, husbands, and roommates.

I am not talking about losing someone for good  or forever — I mean, getting rid of the nonstop chattering, crying, whining, chatter of your household. Peace and quiet for just one night. An evening to do whatever you wanted. Watch whatever you want. Eat whatever you want. Write or paint or do some research without disturbance.

Then suddenly you have that opportunity. The kids are going by grandma! Hubby or wife is going out to dinner with friends! Husband is hunting or wife is at a seminar. You have the whole afternoon/evening free!

Oh, the things you will do! The projects you will start/finish! Now you can finally watch that R rated movie you couldn’t with kids around. You can make that shrimp/pineapple pizza you wanted to try or make yourself an ice cream sundae and not have to share!

Then the time comes.

You are like a zombie. 

Don’t know what to do first. 

So you start with having a glass of wine or soda. You look at the pizza ingredients — you’re not sure you want to waste time making something from scratch. And all that clean up! A ham sandwich would do just fine. 

Then it comes to projects. There are so many! I’ll write. No — I’ll finish cutting out that pattern. But then you spot the movie you’ve been waiting to watch. So you decide to watch the movie, then write. 

But there is a pile of laundry in the washer and your kids will need their soccer clothes in the morning and while you’re changing around laundry there are a few dishes you should really put in the dishwasher. 

You didn’t mean to get so sidetracked so early in your freedom. But do just a few little things and your guilt won’t be so heavy. After all, even though you did promise to make a cake for the party tomorrow, you can always pick one up at the store …

And so it goes. The movie isn’t as good as you thought it would be. You couldn’t think of a thing to write. Grammar was boring. You’ve already watched Downton Abbey or Game of Thrones a hundred times, so no power watching there.

You get an upset stomach from the wine, and really wish you would have made that pizza. That bubble bath you promised yourself suddenly feels like a lot of work. Maybe just pj’s and to bed early with a good book. That’s it — you’ll read all night!

Five minutes after you climb in bed you have to go to the bathroom. Fifteen minutes later the dogs need to go outside. You start to read and the phone rings. Campaign robot reminding you to vote. You find your place in the book again and you find you need to go to the bathroom. Again.

Finally, you give up, turn out the lights, and go to sleep at nine.

This is usually how my “night alone” goes. The best laid plans often get waylaid, messed up, dashed, or postponed. 

Don’t let it get you down. The cosmos has plans for you, and sometimes it decides to mooch in on your private time. If nothing else, your sidetracked ideas will last until the next time you get to be “alone.”

Next time tell the cosmos  to mind its own business.

 

 

 

An Evening Alone

~ humoringthegoddess ~ 18 Comments

Do you ever wish you had an evening or two to yourself? All by yourself?

That seems to often be a fleeting thought to new moms, seasoned moms, wives, husbands, and roommates.

I am not talking about losing someone for good  or forever — I mean, getting rid of the nonstop chattering, crying, whining, chatter of your household. Peace and quiet for just one night. An evening to do whatever you wanted. Watch whatever you want. Eat whatever you want. Write or paint or do some research without disturbance.

Then suddenly you have that opportunity. The kids are going by grandma! Hubby or wife is going out to dinner with friends! Husband is hunting or wife is at a seminar. You have the whole afternoon/evening free!

Oh, the things you will do! The projects you will start/finish! Now you can finally watch that R rated movie you couldn’t with kids around. You can make that shrimp/pineapple pizza you wanted to try or make yourself an ice cream sundae and not have to share!

Then the time comes.

You are like a zombie. 

Don’t know what to do first. 

So you start with having a glass of wine or soda. You look at the pizza ingredients — you’re not sure you want to waste time making something from scratch. And all that clean up! A ham sandwich would do just fine. 

Then it comes to projects. There are so many! I’ll write. No — I’ll finish cutting out that pattern. But then you spot the movie you’ve been waiting to watch. So you decide to watch the movie, then write. 

But there is a pile of laundry in the washer and your kids will need their soccer clothes in the morning and while you’re changing around laundry there are a few dishes you should really put in the dishwasher. 

You didn’t mean to get so sidetracked so early in your freedom. But do just a few little things and your guilt won’t be so heavy. After all, even though you did promise to make a cake for the party tomorrow, you can always pick one up at the store …

And so it goes. The movie isn’t as good as you thought it would be. You couldn’t think of a thing to write. Grammar was boring. You’ve already watched Downton Abbey or Game of Thrones a hundred times, so no power watching there.

You get an upset stomach from the wine, and really wish you would have made that pizza. That bubble bath you promised yourself suddenly feels like a lot of work. Maybe just pj’s and to bed early with a good book. That’s it — you’ll read all night!

Five minutes after you climb in bed you have to go to the bathroom. Fifteen minutes later the dogs need to go outside. You start to read and the phone rings. Campaign robot reminding you to vote. You find your place in the book again and you find you need to go to the bathroom. Again.

Finally, you give up, turn out the lights, and go to sleep at nine.

This is usually how my “night alone” goes. The best laid plans often get waylaid, messed up, dashed, or postponed. 

Don’t let it get you down. The cosmos has plans for you, and sometimes it decides to mooch in on your private time. If nothing else, your sidetracked ideas will last until the next time you get to be “alone.”

And next time tell the cosmos  to mind its own business.

 

 

 

 

 

One More Minute…

~ humoringthegoddess ~ 6 Comments

clock Anyone a member of the 1MM Club?

No, not the 1 Million Mile Club. The 1 More Minute Club.

You know — that time-share world that is almost always self-serving, self-indulgent, and often futile. The club where you think, “one more minute…”

I suppose if you are watching the morning weather and stay one more minute to make sure you heard right, and you miss the deer crossing the road at 6:46 a.m. that you would have hit had you not stayed one more minute…, then that’s okay.

I’m talking about those every day happenings you think will matter more if you extend them one more minute.

I am a big one in this Club.

In the shower, forehead pressed against the far shower stall wall, hot water soaking my tired body: staying in the water for one more minute…

Laying in my morning bed, still dark outside, alarm goes off, time to get ready for work: staying in bed for one more minute…

Watching the weather channel in the morning, staying to check the weather for the third time just in case I missed something: watching it just one more minute…

Writing: I’m almost done with this chapter. I’ll just write for one more minute…

Reading: Whether or not I’m really “into” the book, there are just a few more paragraphs until the chapter is over: Let me read for one more minute…

Kids use this excuse all the time. We think nothing of letting them have one more minute of bath time or play time or before-bed time. What’s one minute in the scheme of things? Yet these same parents, these same people, justify their own few minutes by pretending to end it in one more minute…

I know that personal time is in a different dimension from the one we live in. We never have enough time to do the things we love, and way too much time to do the things we don’t. That’s the cosmic way. Kids are never aware of the clock. In their natural state they do things until they’re done doing them. They are done when they are satisfied.

Adults, on the other hands, are mostly slaves of the clock. We have to be. Doctor appointments and trains and time clocks don’t wait.  They know if they give one minute here it will accumulate to hours there.

Who do we think we’re fooling? If we think the situation will be any better one more minute from now, we are usually wrong. For most of us one minute blends into the next into the next. We have lost track of so many one more minute’s that we could fill the space between the stars.

In defense of the members of this Club, though, I have to admit…when I “allow” myself one more minute of whatever, I concentrate and fill that minute with all the enjoyment and cosmicness I possibly can. That hot shower is like fingers massaging my back; that paragraph that I’m writing is the best I’ve ever written. It is so because I crammed hours of enjoyment into a very small amount of time.  And most of the time, it’s worth it.

Just like the minute it took you to read this.