I had a lot of cosmic thoughts and revelations over the past few weeks — weddings, renewals, coming full circle in a number of relationships. I had flashes of words about bursting hearts and life and bonds that never end. All that deep, esoteric stuff.
Yet I sit in front of the computer today and it’s all gone. The emotions, the brilliance, the meaning of it all. In trying to find the words and thoughts I wanted to share I’ve come up empty.
Sometimes getting deep and sentimental and cosmic is a lot of work. It takes a lot out of you.
I sometimes wonder if it’s all worth it. The long nights, the connecting the dots, the forgive and forget. The ulcers we’ve created changing our fate. The insomnia we suffer trying to figure out what went wrong. How we could have changed things. Made the world a better place.
Perhaps it’s that I’m getting older, but I am tired of the toll over-thinking and over-feeling has taken on me. Everybody feels, everybody emotes, everybody thinks. Many of us, though, over-think and over-feel. And that’s not good for our heads nor our hearts.
Nothing wrong with feeling good and feeling great and making a difference in someone’s life. We all should try it. We should all do it. But I don’t think we should get carried away with it.
When we think too much or feel too much it’s hard to come back to center. Your emotions play tricks on you on both ends of the scale. Think too much and your stress levels shoot through the roof. Think too little and you miss a chance to actually accomplish something.
I was all hepped up a few days ago to tell you about my highs and lows and discoveries. But after I calmed down and thought about my feelings I found my calm center again and realized I didn’t need to use this platform as a sounding board. That I could feel and understand and move forward all on my own. That I didn’t have to report every little emote.
My true calling in life these days is to encourage people to create. To let their experiences guide them to another world, another dimension, that is directly connected to this one, and to bring something back to this reality. To take their own highs and lows and super emotes and use them to create something beautiful in any art form.
Maybe what I’m trying to say is don’t over-think and over-feel everything. Let the moments just flow, and let that flow create something that is truly you.